I grew up in a family of five sons. Most of the games we played had to have a winner and a loser. Competition was expected and joined in by everyone – well, everyone except my mother. In some ways, my father was the number one competitor. I remember that when Christmas came and we opened presents, there was always at least one game with a target or a way of getting more points than the other players. My father was always the first one to play the game. I had a very loving family, but we were always competing with each other.
Jesus shows us a very different example. When he even heard a rumor that people were seeing competition between him and John, he left the area. He wanted to avoid even the appearance of competition. The disciples, on the other hand, fell into the competition trap on at least two different occasions, even after Jesus had warned them about it.
With my competitive background, I found myself competing with my wife in little things: to prove who was right on some matter of disagreement, even sometimes subtly competing for the affection of the children. My wife grew up in a different atmosphere, and it was very hard for her to understand why I behaved like that.
I have not yet entirely learned not to compete, but after some years of marriage, the Lord helped me to stop competing against my wife and instead compete to make her happy. If there was something that was hard for her, that thing became my competitor, and I wanted to beat it so that she could be happy.
May God help us to free our homes and our relationships of unhealthy competition, and replace it with cooperation.
- 7 DECEMBER -